Everything has changed. What used to be dark is now full of light. Where dust used to fly it is now calm. Where stagnant energy was stuck there is flow. And there's color everywhere. What used to be empty is now full of our belongings. We are home.
I can't think about the construction process without getting a little sad. I miss the guys. Activity, ideas, the creative process in full bloom. It was thrilling, like labor. I felt like I had a purpose.
I have a lot of catching up to do. I stopped updating this blog at the end of June even though the whole process wasn't completed till after January, almost an entire year. The major work was done by the end of September and most of the crew had been moved to other projects before that. We still had a punch list that needed to be tended to that would take us to the end of the year. Most people probably wouldn't have tolerated that but I knew that getting upset would not help anyone and I really only had one option, to trust Caleb, my project manager.
Through the process I have grown fond of him . I have gotten to know him and I have begun to think of him as a friend. After all, he was in my house for almost a whole year.
At the end of phase one. The kitchen was done and we could move back in and start cooking again. The back part of the addition was under construction. We had issues with the foundation that would take us almost to the end of May before the new structure was put in place. It was at this time that I learned about my father's illness. I remember standing on the front porch talking to my dad as I watched the guys, a full crew that day, unload the Pella windows from the truck. Dad was waiting to hear from his doctor about his treatment plan. I wasn't expecting this. My dad religiously followed the blog and always asked about "The Big Blue House Project". He would have loved these guys. He would have enjoyed being here. He too would have found the construction process thrilling.
The week before Easter we took the family on two trips hoping to give the crew some "alone time" in case they wanted to do something messy like sand the floors. I spent the first part of that week visiting my dad. I showed him video footage of the latest construction at the house and while at home we went out to his "shop" where we had spent many hours with his tools. He would make for me whatever I asked him to make. We took a look around the shop and he said, "Take what ever you want, I won't be spending anymore time out here I'm done." I said, "Dad...!" but he insisted on loading me up with tools. Much of my relationship with my father was about swapping tools and finding handy gadgets that we would hand off to each other. I would discover some tool that he had never seen and he would give me what ever I needed. He loaded me up with exacto blades and hammers with tiny screw drivers hidden in the handle, small metal rulers. He showed his affection by giving me stuff. Always a full car load when he came down to visit.
When I returned to Jenkintown it was at the end of the workday. Chris was in his truck ready to leave for the day. I walked over to the truck, my arms full of treasures. "What 'cha got there?" he asked. "Tools from my dad. He's sick and he's giving me his tools. I'm not ready for this."
The next day I showed the guys my bounty of tools. Among other things I had a tool, that has a curved metal blade with a handle on each end. Medium size. I swear I saw the pupils in Niko's eyes dilate when I pulled it form my box. He looked excited and said, "I've been looking for one like that. " I believe one of the reasons my dad put me in charge of his tools is because he knows that if I don't have a use for it that I will give them to a good home. I said to Niko, " I don't have any idea what I would ask for this, but my father is a giver. So in the spirit of my dad I will give this to you because I know you'll appreciate it and will use it." I also pulled out these small wooden boxes. Niko said, "Hey those are from sewing machines, they're really cool." I said, " How did you know that?" His reply, "Because I've got some too." The next time that Niko came out to the house he showed me the tools that I had given to him. The rust had been removed and they were so sharp they could shave the hair form his arm. Later Niko made for me a cutting board that matches the island in exchange for my dad's tools.
A few weeks later I would get the call from my brother saying that my dad's first chemo treatment went badly and he had been air lifted to a hospital in Pittsburgh. My mother drove strait form the ER and had nothing but the clothes on her back. I had to first drive to their house and pack a suit case for mom and then drive out to Pittsburgh. It was around five o'clock p.m. when I got the call. Caleb was working on the second floor landing. He was filling in the gaps with black filler and the painters were just finishing up the hallway and the kitchen and dining room. As I quickly threw some things in a bag I said to Caleb, " I don't know when I will be back. But I will have my phone and can be reached by email as well. Don't hesitate to call if anything comes up." And I set out for my drive across Pennsylvania. I made it to Pittsburgh by one a.m. I still remember the spontaneous smile that appeared on my dad's face when I walked into the ICU. He had already been taken off of the ventilator and was able to sit up and talk. I spent the next six days there. I had daily contact from Caleb keeping me up on what was going on back home. "Be sure to get a good picture of the kitchen while the floor is shiny and new. I can't wait to see how the kitchen cubbies look with the new paint job." It was a welcome distraction and kept me in contact with my other reality.
While dad was in the ICU, between offering me food off of his lunch tray, always a giver, any time we were alone he would tell me where he had things hidden around the house. I didn't know it at the time but it was one of our last conversations. He told me about two pieces of walnut out in the shop. He said, "They'll be dirty, they won't look like anything but don't throw them out. They're from Grandpap Hoover." Grandpap Hoover used to be a sawyer. Because of Greensaw, I knew exactly why this wood was special. I've seen them do amazing things with "dirty wood". I later found the wood and brought it home. It had a piece of newspaper stuck to it that was from the year 1961.
When I returned to Jenkintown, phase one painting was completed and the floors in the dining room had been sanded and sealed as well as the second floor hall. The laundry room was in working order. There were still some boards that needed to be replaced but it looked great. We were still working through the details of how to handle the snag with the foundation. Caleb had a lot on his plate. His crew was dwindling. The first foundation did not pass inspection. In the background Caleb was going to bat for me trying to get the kitchen counter top replaced because the guy who installed it, broke it off site, glued it back together and tried to pass it off as perfect condition. We did go through a phase where everything seemed to be going wrong. Caleb had gotten a new ipad and he let me play around with it. While he wasn't looking I typed a note and left it in his notebook app. It said, "Caleb is an awesome project manager." I think he may have found it during one of those weeks when he needed to hear it the most.
One of the things that I like about Caleb is that I can talk to him and bounce ideas. He has a quiet demeanor and perfect manners. He's conscientious and hard working. Back in February we discussed the cedar siding for the new addition. I suggested staining them three or four shades of red. Instead of trying to change my mind he said, Ooo, I like that idea..." But then he had to assemble a crew to do the staining. Most of the guys had been assigned to a bigger Greensaw job that was going on simultaneously. Every time the subject came up I knew it was a concern that weighed on him. I thought to myself, " I could do that." So in the end he didn't have much choice, I volunteered and spent a few weeks working along side the Greensaw crew staining the wood. We used, Cherry, Red Barn, Red Wood stain. I stained equal stacks of those colors. Some with two coats some with three, some with only one. Then there was a pile that had random layers of the three colors. We created a pattern by simply choosing one from each color pile always in the same order and it didn't matter how long the boards were. The result was even more stunning than we had imagined and it was our first collaboration.
The end of May my dad was once again air lifted to a hospital in Pittsburgh. This time it was Shadyside, my old neighborhood. My dad had gotten a virus and so they sent him to ICU. In case his condition got worse they wanted to transport him while they could. His condition had gotten worse. In addition to the Lymphoma he got a virus that turned into an infection. The only thing the doctors would say was, "He is a very sick man." It was the nurses who gave us the most hope, who tended to him round the clock. He had been sedated so that he wouldn't have the urge to pull out all of the tubes. I spent the next six days simply waiting for my dad to wake up. Hoping and praying that I would get to see his blue eyes again. Caleb was in communication. I know he didn't want to disturb me but I assured him it was a welcome distraction. He emailed me sink options and I also heard form Jim the architect. I was happy to have something else to think about. After a week I had to return home. The kids had appointments and I needed to get my car tuned and my hair cut. Dad woke up after I left so I drove out the following weekend to see him. The first thing he asked about was the "Big Blue House". This was at the end of May. It took most of June to install the siding which was about two weeks longer than expected. The tub guy came and re-enameled the tub for which I had traded a hand made felted purse. The wiring and insulation went in, the drywall crew returned, the painters came back. A rather large crew headed by Niko appeared when it was time to install the third floor deck in excruciating heat.
The very last Tuesday in June. My mom called with the news that the doctors had done all that they could do for my dad. He never went home after that last trip to ICU in Shadyside. He spent a few more weeks there and then he was transferred to Geisinger Hospital close to the center of the state but on the eastern side. A shorter drive. They had taken him off of the ventilator and he had a trach in his throat. He was awake and alert and could converse. It was hard to hear him but he had his wits about him. I needed to go to his bedside for his final days. The first person that I told from the crew was Niko. I hated that I had made the conversation awkward for him by telling him why I had to leave. I couldn't find Caleb so I needed to tell someone before I left because once again I didn't know when I would be returning. Caleb did arrive in time for me to tell him myself. I said, " I don't know what condition I will be in when I return but don't be afraid to approach me." And again I gave him permission to contact me if anything came up.
I spent my dad's last hospital night in his room with him before the ambulance would drive him "home" the following day. There we sat by his bedside, rubbing his feet, giving him sips of sprite, as his breathing became more labored and would finally stop. I literally held his hand through most of it. I didn't want him to feel alone. I did take occasional breaks to check an email or communicate with a friend about how things were going. I even sent an email or two to Caleb. I didn't hold back. I was in the moment and I told him a story about the freaky thing that happened in the middle of my father's last night where the T. V. turned on all by itself and the show that came on was about angels. I trusted that I could share that and hoped that it didn't make him uncomfortable. I remember he answered my email and I found some comfort in that.
My father passed away on July 1st but we couldn't have the viewing or the funeral till after the Fourth of July holiday. For the time between those days I felt great comfort in spending time in my dad's shop. Everything was as he left it. It was like he was still there. I photographed it, documented it one last time before I moved anything around. I inherited the contents of my dad's shop and my brother inherited his car. My dad, who showered me with love by giving me stuff, left me with one final treasure trove. I know I won't be able to keep it all and so I have already talked to my Greensaw guys about letting them have the pick of the litter once I decide what I can keep and what will have to find a home.
Tuesday, the day of the viewing, was the night that the Greensaw DIY episode aired. If I had been back in Jenkintown I would not have been able to see it. I watched it with my family. I was glad that my brother could see it and see the crew. Every time we saw Niko in the frame my kids would yell, "NIKO!" I talked to Caleb on the phone one afternoon. I think it was after the funeral and it was nice to hear his voice and talk about something normal.
I returned to Jenkintown with boxes of treasures from my dad's collection. I found another one of those wood tools like I had given to Niko so I gave it to Caleb. I found this other tool that I couldn't figure out what it was used for it was a triangular shaped scoop attached to a little handle. It was a nice object in it's on right and I knew Caleb would like it too.
There's something about Caleb that I can't quite put my finger on that reminds me of my grandfather's generation. He's thoughtful and quiet. Maybe he just reminds me of my grandfather who was also quiet smart thoughtful and polite with a good sense of humor who also worked with his hands. I don't know... Once when Caleb and I were on a field trip to Fran's house. Fran lives in the next town over and her house is a Greensaw House. Niko was her project manager. She invited us over to give us a tour. She sourced her own salvage for the project including an old stove that she had repaired and installed. When she was talking about it I will forever have this image of Caleb in my head, kneeling down, reaching out gently touching the knob with his thumb and talking about a memory of his grandfather. On the way home we discovered a fallen tree in a neighbors yard that later turned into a small Greensaw adventure.
There were many days when the crew had vanished and it was just the two of us here. Sometimes I would treat Caleb to Indian food for lunch. I would let him choose what he wanted and then we would share. My family won't eat Indian food so it was a treat for me too.
I had a set of cards called "Table Talk" I bought them when I was in Pittsburgh. When we stood by my father's bed we never knew what to say and I thought we should talk so that he could hear our voices and maybe come out of his sleep. So I bought this set of cards with conversation starters. After I came home, at dinner, my family would chose a few cards and we would have conversations. So for awhile the cards were always on the table. One day at lunch I pulled out a card and read it to Caleb. I knew I had put him on the spot. He gave me a look that said, "Oh you really want me to answer." The question was if you could be any movie character from any movie which one would it be? He said he would be the guy from the movie Brazil. I didn't want to leave him hanging out there so I answered it too. I told him I always related to the woman from the Fisher King who got trapped in the revolving door every day. "They're both Terry Gilliam films." he said. Interesting.
I remember the day that Caleb removed the plywood divider that was between the dining room and the new family room. For months it was boarded up with a plywood door that the guys would unscrew and take off during the day and screw back into place at night. The day he removed it for good was a happy day. (I have it on video tape.)
It was Caleb's idea to use the scraps from the floor to line the threshold into the new family room. It was my idea to paint pale blue trim on the inside of that threshold that creates an optical illusion. Late in the afternoon while standing in the family room the blue paint will look like a shadow next to the white trim, but when you walk through and look at the blue against the pale yellow trim in the dining room, your eye will shift and it won't look like a shadow, it flips to blue paint.
In August we had two problems, well three actually, we had a tile guy who wouldn't leave and a plumber who never showed up. The third problem was the floor guy who constantly blew us off. Six weeks. SIX weeks to tile a bathroom. Niko and his crew returned to install the mantles, the entertainment cabinet and window seats in the new family room and also the master bedroom. He started working on the vanity for the master bath. One day Tile Guy and Niko butted heads and Caleb had to go break it up. Samir also returned to work on the drawers in the master bedroom. The painters returned. Things were moving along. Caleb was spending more time here. Making an appearance on a number of Saturdays. When he was installing the heating elements in the floor of the master bath, he stayed past seven. I tucked some left over dinner in his bag because I knew when he got home the last thing he would want to do would be to make dinner.
Then one day Dan and Samir and his crew arrived and put a "spit shine" on all the kitchen cabinets and other wooden features. That was the day I saw them loading up the Greensaw truck, clearing everything form the garage. My eyes wanted to tear. After that the crew members seemed to peel off one at a time, Von Trapp style, "So Long, farewell..." They were smart to wean me off of Greensaw slowly. But what I didn't know was how soon after that Caleb would be taken off of my project and sent to another job site. We still had a list of things to complete. Some of them were pretty big items like the lighting fixtures for the kitchen, dining room and second floor landing and a vanity for the girls bathroom. There were still holes in the floor that needed to be filled. I know Caleb was torn and he was in a bad situation. At this point I just had to trust that he would return to finish. His big blue toolbox was still chained to the old swingset in the back yard. At least I had some collateral.
I didn't see Caleb much during the month of September. Sometime in the fall we regrouped and I got him back for the better part of a week and he finished up the stucco patch on the third floor deck and railing. We slowly chipped away at the list. Dave made a special trip out to discuss the lighting fixtures that he designed and Caleb installed. The remaining items on the list were, in my opinion, the things that we had the most fun brain storming back in the days before everyone was over worked and stressed, the days when we could bounce ideas around like hackey sac balls. I insisted that we see them through.
Some of these were ideas that orginated in my discussions with C2 Architecture. before Greensaw came on the scene. Because I was hosting Thanksgiving that became our deadline for the lighting fixtures. Days before the holiday Caleb came up with a plan. We still needed one last fixture for the dining room. Caleb found a lighting fixture that was made out of felted wool. It. was. perfect. I told him he had just been promoted to personal shopper. He begged the store owner for the floor model that he installed in time for the holiday and afterwards when they had more nicer ones in stock he would swap them out. When my art group the Mama Citas saw it they asked wher I had gotten it. I told them my project manager found it for me. One of them replied, " awh, I want a project manager."
There was an open ended discussion that becgan with C2 about building some racks to hold my indian club collection. Caleb and I decided that it would be a great thing to make with my dad's two treasured walnut boards. I told him I wanted to use every scrap. So we collaborated again. I gave him a general idea and he took it from there. He made three racks that hang on the wall on the second floor in what I call "Caleb's hall of fame". There was an open ended discussion about filling the holes in the wooden floor in the hallway with left over tile from the bathroom and kitchen. But we never quite believed that we could successfully marry the two different materials, tile and wood. So I said to Caleb, "What if we made circles out of wood, circles in circles with the black filler to match the floor but use it as a design element. That's what he finished installing the night before Thanksgiving. He came back once or twice in December and we exchanged Christmas presents. We talked about a future collaboration based on an idea that we have been kicking around since last February. We have a list of things that hopefully will keep me in touch with the Greensaw crew for months to come. In January, just before our one year anniversary, I had Greensaw come back to reclaim my garage. They cleaned it out and insulated it. Reorganized it, re wired it, built shelves and a really nice work bench and prepared a new home for all of my dad's tools.
A few weeks ago I drove down to Greensaw's shop. I was greeted with familar smiles and a few hugs. Caleb and I went to lunch to discuss some new ideas. We split a piece of key lime pie for dessert. Like old friends our conversation picked up right where it had left off and
I was comforted knowing that nothing has changed.
I have a reputation with some of my friends where they believe things just come to me or fall right into place. Once when my karate instructor's instructor was visiting from Florida we had a discussion about Qi Gung and how certain exercises will help your heart and others will cleanse your liver and so on... I was interested because I wanted to see if Qi Gung could help me with my ADD. I asked him, "How do you find a Qi Gung teacher? Do you look in the yellow pages? Do you need a referral form your doctor?... The very next day I went to a party that was for a little girl in my daughter's preschool class. I didn't know this group of moms and the only person I knew was the hostess. I walk into the party a little early, only a few people there and the hostess said"Oh , Teresa, here, meet my friend Donna, she's my Qi Gung teacher."Coincidence? I don't know, I didn't question it, I just went to her class the next day.
